A sunken ship

A few weekends ago we were down in Baltimore visiting some family.  I mentioned it here.  It was a rather quick trip, but I was excited as we were going to be going out on their boat.  It was to be a quick ride, so we got the kids all geared up and the men went to ready the boat.

This would be my first time on a boat like this.  Most of our time is spent in a small fishing boat just big enough to hold our family...and nothing else.  I was excited.  We all were excited.  Until...there was trouble.  The men spent quite some time trying to get it going, but it turns out the battery died.  Bummer!  We were slightly disappointed, but were promised a ride on our next trip down in July.

Well, it doesn't look like that will be happening now either.  You see, what happened is this, they got the battery replaced and loaded up the boat with some friends of theirs and hit the water.  Now, you must know that they live on the Chesapeake Bay.  This is not a man-made lake that I'm most accustomed to.  Well, anyway, while out on the water, a seal in the motor went bad and they took on water.  In six minutes the boat sank to the bottom of the Chesapeake.  Yep, you read that right, it sank.

Everyone made it off ok and were picked up by a passing sail boat.  The coast guard has since pulled it out of the water and it is now considered a total loss.  They are looking to replace it, and I must admit I hope they do so before our trip back down. 

Is it me, or is that just crazy?  I mean, how often do boats sink like that?  And to think, that could have been us.  I am soooo glad that the battery failed that day and I did not have to endure a ride on a sinking ship.

The house no one wanted

This past weekend we visited Andy's cousins home in Maryland.  It's a sort-of resort for our family.  They live in a very quiet community with many amenities.  And waterfront!!

Just steps (literally steps) away from the waterfront there is a house.  A house yes, a home...not so much.

The "story" is, that this house has stood empty for some 25 odd years.  That's a long time.  No one has stepped foot in there.  It is said that the furniture is still there and if you look in the windows, there are knick-knacks on the window sill.  If you look closely, you can see the curtains still hanging in the windows.

Who does this?  Who walks away from a home?  I have been trying to wrap my head around it, but I just can't.  Every house has a story.  If walls could talk they would tell of days gone by.  They would show you their scars, the pencil markings of children growing.  The holes from pictures and drawings moved over the years.  The floors show their age.  The dents and dings, the stains and the knicks.  Even the creakings that they feel.

Not this house.  It has no story.  No one to tend to it.  No one to give it love.  No one to pull in the driveway, no sign marking it "Home Sweet Home."  In fact, it is in such a state of disrepair, that it will need to be demolished.  It seems such a waste to me.  Knock down the old to make way for the new.

I love old houses.  I always have.  My preference is not to buy a new home, but one that is old.  Like that comfortable old quilt thrown over the couch, or the old t-shirt that you just keep wearing.  When we're comfortable, we're happy.  My old used home is comfortable and makes me happy.  Someday I hope this home will have someone to love it.  Someone who will make memories and give it a story.  One to make it proud, instead of the sad forgotten building it is.

The land of "in-between"

Last night we had the pleasure of attending church.  We haven't done so in years as the church we currently attend no longer holds Sunday evening service.  Let me just say, it was wonderful.  I sang a song (a hymn) I hadn't sung for a long time.  It was quite refreshing.

A missionary was the guest speaker and his message was written for us.  That's right, just us.  No one else.  Okay, so maybe not, but you get the point.  He spoke about the Isrealites and their time in the wilderness.  The land of in-between.

My husband nudged me and we chuckled as we are definately in the land of in-between.  It's not a fun place to be.  There is fear there.  There are questions and doubts.  There is discontentment and frustration.  It's not all bad.  There is also excitement and a sense of a "starting over."

Well, God used this message as a means of encouragement to me.  In the fear and doubt, He asks "Do you trust me?  Do you trust me?"...Do I?  I mean I say I do, but this is one of those things that I have to really really trust that what we are doing is His will.

The Isrealites wandered for 40 years in the land of in-between.  They complained.  So did I...Ouch.  I'm no different than them.  But one thing I'm so glad about is that in God's grace He did not allow us to wander for 40 years.

It's just awesome because we see Him continually reassuring us to trust Him and follow His will.  And last night was one of those cases.  The whole service was just refreshing and spiritually uplifting.  I am just so glad we felt His nudge and went to church.  And even more, I'm so glad he sent the missionary as His tool to speak to our hearts.

Happy Memorial Day!

Just popping in to wish you a Happy Memorial Day.  I hope your day brings good food, time with family, and lots of fun.

Giving Thanks

If you've seen my sidebar than you know that I'm reading the book "One Thousand Gifts."  It is taking me forever, but I am glad about that.  There is so much to gleen from the pages of that book.

It has been stirring me up inside and in my way of thinking.  I love it.  I have this friend to thank.

Anyway, I just wanted to express what I'm thankful for right now.  Right this moment.

*Fresh air.
*Sunshine
*Clothes hanging on the line.
*Getting home in time to get the clothes off the line when the rain came.
*Rain
*Flowers
*Sadie (my dog and probably the most loyal companion in my life.)
*5th grade projects (getting done)
*A night out
*Watching my neices play soccer
*Sarah
*My front porch
*Nighttime Walks
*Windshield wipers that work
*This house...I mean, our HOME.
*Hot running water
*Joy in trials
*Being loved
*Having someone to love
*Fresh sheets
*My bed
*Reading blogs and feeling so overwhelmed by the message they bring.
*Christian fiction
*New sneakers
*My cell phone.  So I can talk to my husband who is out of town...again.
*Mom, helping with my boys

Okay, so I could go on and on.  I have been following the Nester.  She is currently in Tanzania with Compassion.  Her recent posts have me realizing just how blessed, how much God has given me.  I'm overflowing with goodness and just had to share some of it.

Before I end this post I want to share this new awesome song.  You can't help but feel gratitude.

Enjoy.

Our new (used) coffee table

I have been on the search for a new coffee table for our living room.  I recently found this baby at a local thrift store.

I'm sorry to say that I had already begun to sand it, so I don't have the original "before" picture.  : [  It had what some would call "good bones."  It's solid wood and the size was perfect.  I also loved the style.  When I brought it home my husband was less than impressed.  Usually he can see potential.  I don't know what he didn't see.  Anyhoo, I spent a lot of time sanding, sanding and sanding some more.  What you can't see in the picture is the finish.  It was a thick thick stain of a reddish color all over.  Not quite what I wanted.

I had all of the supplies I needed on hand.  Wasn't a real complicated job.  Just time consuming.  Waiting between coats of paint and stain.  Spent more time waiting than doing the work.  : ]

So, here is the finished product.

I am pleased.  We finally have a real "grown-up" coffee table.

So when are you coming over for some coffee to put on my coffee table?


Linking up with Traci at Beneath My Heart for her April "linky" party and with Richella at Imparting Grace for her Grace at home series.

When what you think is the right decision really really hurts

I really don't know where this post will go, so please bare with me.

My feelings are raw.  Fresh and raw.  So fresh my eyes still ache from the many tears that were shed.

I knew this decision would be hard and I knew it would hurt.  I had no idea just how much it would hurt.  I have complete peace about the decision and feel very strongly that it is right and what God wants.  When I shared this decision with someone I love so very much, I knew it would be met with some criticism and hoped there would also be love and support.  Instead what I was met with was judgement, misunderstanding and a lack of compassion.

It hurts.  There is no other way around it.  I feel miserable.  I'm trying to do the best I can at raising my kids.  The truth is, I don't have a clue.  I know I love them and have their best interest at heart.

But what do you do when your family doesn't agree?  I've been so blessed to always have a family that loved and supported me through just about everything.  So this is new territory for me.

I don't know what to do next.  I don't know where this road will lead.  I'm not a fighter.  I don't like confrontation.  I'm not one who likes to cause a big stink.  I was trying to avoid all of that, but ended up walking right into it.

So, I'm sure I'll get over it.  In time.  I know I'll be sorry for bringing on pain.  I know I'll forgive.  In time.  But I also know I'll bear the scars of the deep deep pain forever.  In all honesty I'm sick of it.  So sick of just letting the daggers fly at me and not doing anything about it.  I've just never been one that wanted to hurt others even if they've hurt me.  I guess it's because I know how much it hurts and I don't want to do that to someone else.

I don't know what else to say.  I hope that things will look better in the morning.  Things always look better in the morning.  Right?  It won't change what is, but maybe just maybe it will.